Contributor: Pranas Perkunas
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I opened the door one morning to a new world. For the first time, the homeless cats weren’t crying; they asked me if I was hungry. The neighbors' demented dogs refrained from barking against their too-short leashes; instead, they sang sumptuous strains of ancient mermaid songs. I arrived late for work, but my normally severe manager just laughed, clicked his heels, and crooned this little ditty,
Here's a check that should tide you over
for a few million lifetimes or so;
you can stay and groove with us,
or you can happily go.
I surveyed the scene behind him, which consisted chiefly of a bevy of my now-lovely co-workers, their collective youth restored, and their formerly unfortunate features reformed to fit their individual tastes.
An Asian, cosplay princess shining among the others beckoned to...
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Author:
Pranas Perkunas
