Linguistic Erosion

Contributor: Nick Marcantel - - The submarine was making its last run in the depths of the Baltic Sea after a long day of finding nothing of any interest. The crew had become restless and longed to return home after their disappointing voyage. Peter Lindberg, the submarine’s captain, gave into his crew’s wishes and decided to return. “It’s okay, boss. We’ll just come back next week,” a jolly man by the name of Stephen Richards said as he patted Lindberg on the back. “Yeah, of course,” Lindberg replied as he swallowed back his discontent. He wanted to find something in the Baltic Sea that he could be proud of, but after weeks of searching nothing even remotely impressive turned up on their sonars. “Lindberg, do yah’ want some Vienna sausages,” another crewmate piped up struggling to speak as he had his mouth full of the sausages. Lindberg...

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